


that was not me

by Songbird_wings



Series: It Leaves Me Broken [1]
Category: Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Ahsoka Tano Needs a Hug, Angst, Brother/Sister dynamic, Day 1, Febuwhump 2021, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Mind Control, Planet Mortis (Star Wars), Post-Mortis Arc (Star Wars: The Clone Wars), Prompt Fill, Protective Anakin, Whump
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-05
Updated: 2021-02-05
Packaged: 2021-03-16 19:55:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,179
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29213022
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Songbird_wings/pseuds/Songbird_wings
Summary: Ahsoka regains her lost memories from Mortis
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, Snips and Skyguy - Relationship
Series: It Leaves Me Broken [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2144823
Comments: 4
Kudos: 49
Collections: febuwhump 2021





	that was not me

**Author's Note:**

> This is for Febuwhump 2021  
> Day 1: Mind Control
> 
> Enjoy :)

They wouldn’t tell her what happened, and she couldn’t remember anything passed being taken from the ship. The monsters talons gripping her shoulders, the winds drying her tears. She tried to use the Force to slow him down, but her powers were useless compared to the beasts. 

She woke up, laying on the ground, coughing up whatever was in her lungs. _ How did she get here? _ Then suddenly, someone was wrapped around her. A familiar hold and her connection with her Master washed her with a calming ease. She had asked what happened, but all Anakin said was,

“Nothing much, it’s good to see you, snips.” 

They were on route now to Coruscant, the distress signal turned out to be a hoax. The three of them agreed that whatever happened on Mortis was just a strange Force vision, nothing more than that. But, Ahsoka felt otherwise, she  _ knew _ whatever she experienced on that planet was real, even if the other two wouldn’t agree, or admit she was right. 

Anakin had ordered her to sleep once they got aboard. He hadn't done that since she was first assigned to him as his padawan. There was something he wasn’t telling her. 

“Master, I’m fine. I do not need to sleep.” She protested, Anakin turned and looked back at her. His brows furrowed in a way that made him look concerned, yet sympathetic at the same time. He didn’t say anything, he just looked at her, then quickly turned his head around and began walking again. She followed closely behind. 

“I don’t care, Ahsoka.” He said as they walked from the hanger bay into an adjoining corridor. “Whatever  _ happened _ out there was…” He trailed off and his walking pace slowed. “Look, there’s nothing to do now but wait until we get back to Coruscant. Just go back to your room and rest,  _ please _ .” He said, turning to face her now. His eyes looked tired. Not the same as being on the front-lines for three days tired, but another tired that Ahsoka couldn’t quite place. She searched in their bond for how he was really feeling but she seemed to hit a wall. He was blocking her. 

“Fine.” She huffed, crossing her arms over the front of her. 

“Thank you.” Anakin replied before continuing down the corridor alone. 

Ahsoka made her way back to her quarters and sat on her cot. She felt a slight shift and realized they just made the jump to hyperspace. Her body flopped to its side, her head hitting the thin pillow and Ahsoka suddenly felt tired. Her muscles ached and her eyelids became heavy. But, the thought of Mortis flashed in her mind again. She considered going to ask Obi-Wan what happened, but if Anakin wouldn’t tell her the truth, then his former Master certainly wouldn't either. 

_ “Are you proud of me, Master?” She’d asked him. He was stuttering. She didn’t think it was that difficult of a question. Clearly he wasn’t.  _

_ “He said, if you don’t join him, he will kill me!” She giggled. She could sense the anger flare within him. She sensed power.  _

_ “No. I won’t let him!”  _

_ “Then you will be forced to kill me!” She felt her lightsaber hit the palm of her hand before activating it. She pounced, and blue collided with green. He wasn’t fighting back, he was just deflecting her blows. So she swung harder, and faster, until she was out of breath. But her anger towards him drove her to strike again. “And now, the student will kill the Master!” She growled as she pushed against his saber.  _

_ “Getting ahead of yourself, aren't you snips.” She hated that name. It was degrading, it made her feel like a child.  _

_ “Don’t call me that!” She hissed. “I hate it when you call me that!”  _

_ Ahsoka grabbed the sword before it could reach Anakin's hand, and presented it to her new Master.  _

_ “Very good, child.” He said, swinging the blade through the air. “Your usefulness has come to an end.”  _

**_What?_ **

_ He touched her forehead and for a quick second Ahsoka felt pain, sorrow, and regret all at once. Then, she felt nothing.  _

_ “Ahsoka?” her eyes opened to a bright light. She focused her vision and saw she was laying in the fields of Mortis under a tree in the shade. She turned her head, and the Daughter was knelt down next to her, a hand stroking her montral. Ahsoka shot up.  _

_ “Where am I? What happened-”  _

_ The Daughter placed her hand to Ahsoka’s cheek and smiled. A long, sad smile. “My brother had no right to poison you, to control you and your mind. This is my final act, young one.”  _

_ Ahsoka felt tears on her cheek, but she didn’t know why.  _

_ “I will always be a part of you, Ahsoka. Always watching, always protecting.” Her hand faded away, and soon, the Daughter vanished right before her eyes. Ahsoka couldn’t breathe. Something was happening and she tried to call out for Anakin, for Obi-Wan. But, she couldn’t breathe. _

Ahsoka gasped, sitting up in her cot. She must've fallen asleep. Her lost memories on Mortis coming back to her in flashes. Her arms wrapped around her torso, trying to calm her breathing and rapid heart. But, she couldn't stop imagining her lightsaber aimed at Anakins throat, and how he must have felt when he had to watch her  _ die _ . Her mind seemed clouded as her thoughts fogged her brain. She needed to speak with him. Now. 

She found him, tinkering at his table, the smoke from the repairs surrounded his head. She hesitated for a moment, before her knuckles knocked on the metal. He spun around on his stool, nearly dropping his droid when he saw her in the doorway. 

“Ahsoka,” He said getting to his feet. 

“I’m sorry.” She whimpered as he got closer. 

“For-” But she glanced up at him now, the tears flowing freely from her eyes. “Oh.”

“I remember. They came back to me. I remember what happened. What I  _ did! _ ” Anakin pulled her close, and she could sense the wall crumbling down. She felt guilt, immense guilt within her Master. She buried her tear-stricken face into his chest.

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.” She sobbed. Her chest ached with every breath she inhaled. “I didn’t want to. I tried to stop, I-I wanted to stop, I didn’t want to hurt you!” Her words mixed with her cries and she hugged her Masters torso tighter. “It wasn’t me, you know that, right?” She lifted her head for a second to glance up at Anakin. 

“Of course I know, snips.” He said reassuringly. His hand in front of her face and he quickly wiped a few tear droplets from her cheek. “I didn’t teach you to fight so sloppily.” He gave her a smirk. She wiped at her nose and chuckled before laying her face back onto his chest. 

“Thank you, Skyguy.” She whimpered into his robes. 

“It wasn’t your fault, Ahsoka.” He tells her, placing a comforting hand on her back lek. 

“It wasn’t yours either.” 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! If you liked it leave a comment they make my day:)  
> You can find more of my Star Wars content on tumblr @songbird-wings


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